Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) in the Firehouse
What it is • Why it matters • How we adapt
1. Why This Training Matters in the Fire Service
The firehouse is a high-feedback, high-visibility culture:
• Performance is constantly observed
• Mistakes are public
• Corrections are often blunt
• Reputation spreads faster than redemption
For some members—especially those with ADHD, introverted processing styles, or past trauma—this environment can trigger Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD).
Unchecked, RSD can lead to:
• Overreaction to minor feedback
• Withdrawal or shutdown
• Anger or defensiveness
• Avoidance of training, officers, or peers
• Quietly talented firefighters underperforming—or leaving
This is not weakness.
It’s a nervous system response.
2. What Is Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD)?
RSD is an extreme emotional response to perceived rejection, criticism, or disapproval.
Key point:
The reaction is often out of proportion to the actual event, but completely real to the person experiencing it.
Common Triggers in the Firehouse
• Being corrected in front of others
• Tone of voice from an officer
• A look, sigh, or pause
• Failing a skill or check-off
• Being passed over for a role or assignment
• Hearing rumors or silence instead of feedback
What RSD Is Not
• ❌ Laziness
• ❌ Fragile ego
• ❌ Lack of accountability
• ❌ Inability to take feedback
RSD is emotional pain, not attitude.
3. How RSD Shows Up on the Job
Internal Experience (often invisible)
• “They think I’m incompetent.”
• “I’ve already failed here.”
• “Everyone knows.”
• “I’ll never recover from this.”
External Behaviors (what others see)
• Sudden defensiveness
• Over-explaining or justifying
• Going quiet or disengaged
• Avoiding officers or training
• Anger, sarcasm, or irritability
• Perfectionism or fear of trying
Important Firehouse Reality
Firefighters with RSD often care more, not less.
4. Why Firehouse Culture Can Amplify RSD
Fire service norms that unintentionally worsen RSD:
• Public correction as default
• “If I don’t say anything, you’re fine”
• Informal rumor channels
• Humor used as discipline
• Silence after mistakes
• “Figure it out” mentorship styles
None of these are malicious—but for someone with RSD, they can feel career-ending.
5. How to Reduce RSD Impact (Individual Skills)
A. Separate Feedback from Identity
Teach this mantra:
“This is about behavior, not worth.”
Practice:
After feedback, ask yourself:
• What specific behavior was addressed?
• What is the next actionable step?
• What evidence do I have that I’m still trusted?
B. Delay the Emotional Reaction
RSD spikes fast—but fades faster than it feels.
Rule:
Don’t respond to feedback emotionally for 20–30 minutes.
Walk. Hydrate. Breathe.
Then revisit it logically.
C. Request Clear Feedback
Ambiguity fuels RSD.
Teach members to say:
• “Can you give me one thing to fix and one thing I’m doing right?”
• “What does success look like next time?”
This turns fear into structure.
D. Build a Personal Reality Check
Have 1–2 trusted people who can reality-test:
• “Am I reading this accurately?”
• “Is this career-ending—or just a correction?”
6. How Officers & Senior Members Can Help (Without Lowering Standards)
This is not about being softer.
It’s about being clearer.
A. Correct Privately When Possible
Public correction feels like public rejection.
If safety allows:
• Pull aside
• Be brief
• Be specific
• End with expectation
B. Name the Relationship
A simple line prevents spirals:
“This correction doesn’t change how I see you.”
That sentence alone can stop a shutdown.
C. Balance Silence with Signal
Silence often means “you’re fine” to officers—but “I’m failing” to someone with RSD.
Occasional acknowledgment matters:
• “You’re trending in the right direction.”
• “I trust you—this is just refinement.”
7. Adapting Firehouse Culture (Team Level)
Normalize the Language
You don’t need clinical labels—just awareness.
Try:
• “Some people process feedback differently.”
• “Let’s be clear, not vague.”
• “Corrections are about safety, not status.”
Reinforce Growth, Not Just Errors
If the only time someone hears from leadership is when they mess up, RSD thrives.
Balance the ledger.
8. Practical Drill: RSD Awareness Scenario
Scenario:
A firefighter is corrected sharply during a drill. They go quiet for the rest of the shift.
Discussion Questions:
1. What might be happening internally?
2. What assumptions could others make?
3. How could this have been handled differently?
4. What would repair look like after the fact?
9. Bottom Line for the Firehouse
• RSD is real, especially among high performers
• It does not excuse poor performance
• It does explain emotional reactions
• Clear expectations + respectful delivery = stronger crews
Final Message
Strong firefighters aren’t the ones who feel nothing.
They’re the ones who learn to feel it—without letting it control them.
